The Quiet Place

What does it mean to "take up your cross"? Well, I'm finding that taking up my cross means completely submitting to God. It means letting him cut all the things off of me that need to go. It also means obeying what God has asked of me and letting things go when He says "no, my daughter, this isn't for you". Each of these things are challenging in their own way. That last one though, that has been the hardest for me. Yet, in all of the pruning, the pulling out and cutting off; I am still grateful, and I am still blessed. I'm still grateful because I know that God disciplines those he loves, I know that when he disciplines me it's because I'm HIS daughter. I'm grateful because I know that the pain of the pruning leads to an abundant life. It leads to a better Hillary, a better follower of Christ, and a better kingdom builder. It brings God more Glory, and it fills me overflowing with His spirit of peace and joy.  Taking up my cross...

God is at work in me constantly. I am feeling that truth right now more than ever before. He continues to baffle me with his love and mysterious ways. He continues to speak to me things I feel unworthy to know, teach me things I am most grateful to learn. Today I wanted to take some time and share with you what is happening in my heart right now. The past few weeks or maybe even before that, I have been dealing with a big bear called anxiety. Anxiety started to grasp me so much that it was difficult for me to get through the work day. At one point I even debated cutting my day short a few times. I never did leave the office but the consideration of it because of anxiety was definitely a red flag. You could say that this anxiety was brought on by a plethora of things but generally speaking it seems that my current life challenges were overwhelming me. Even though walking through this challenge of anxiety has been completely not fun and at times extremely hard; I am grateful for what ...

In  December of 2013 I found myself attending an all night prayer meeting to support a friend. I thought I was just going to go, support my friend and see the guy I liked at the time. It turns out God had MUCH bigger plans for my heart that night. We arrived the all night prayer meeting around 11pm and entered a very beautifully filled sanctuary. I had the opportunity to pray for others and witness the healing power of Jesus. Little did I know that a few hours into that meeting the Lord would move my heart to full surrender. You see sisters I had been struggling for years with sin and bondage. I was so stuck I didn't even know it was possible not to be stuck. But that night I lifted my shortcomings to the Lord and asked him for freedom and forgiveness. The Lord was faithful to that prayer and set me free. For the first time I experienced the depth of Gods love and grace. He healed me from the mess I was in and made my life and heart more fruitful. It is a moment I will never forget...